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[20 Jun 2005|09:57pm] |
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Sorry, I'm just too lazy to write in this...
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| THE PAST 4 DAYS! |
[08 May 2005|08:48pm] |
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mood |
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 depressed |
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music |
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The Beautiful People- Marilyn Manson |
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Okay... starting on Thursday. Just another normal day. Friday was the best day of my life... or so I thought. I met this awesome guy at Riverside who's 16, almost 17, and he was probably the sweetest guy I'd ever met. We were hanging out and all that awesome stuff. Then he asked me out so I was like yeah, sure, you're a cool guy. I seriously thought I had fallen in love with him, call me corny or whatev, but I've never had a guy act like that towards me. (If you want details, ask.) Well anyways, I had the greatest time of my life and I could just go on and on about how wonderful he is. He's so cuddly and cute and whenever I look at him he gets this adorable little smile on his face :) Well anyway... (if you're going to be stupid and immature about this next part, then don't read it because I don't need your crap right now) today I was telling Lynette all about what we did on the phone and I hear this "click". I hear this thumping up the stairs and apparently my dad had picked up the phone and eavesdropped. Yes, he eavesdropped. My mom pounded up the stairs and gave me an STD talk and "I didn't know anything about sex when I was your age! We were worried about kissing boys at 14!!" So I totally denied it and said we were gossiping about someone else... God, I always have terrible luck. She's like "As hard as a ROCK?! what is this!!?!! Un-zipping pants?!!" I thought I was going to die so I just continued denying it. I practically have to break up with him now... I can't have a guy constantly calling my house or they're going to know that it WAS me and I'm going to be in even more trouble. It's like whenever I turn around I've screwed myself into an even deeper pile of crap. Damn, now I have to call him from the school payphone tomorrow and break up with him since I can't even have the courtesy of private phone calls. Watch me bawling in the hall at lunch. I had to have Amanda call and tell him not to call my house and that I would call him at 11:45 tomorrow. I'm so upset... blahness.
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[04 May 2005|05:11pm] |
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mood |
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 tired |
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music |
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All Apologies- Nirvana |
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eh, I'm really bored.
:x: name: Susannah
:x: height: 5'2
:x: shoe size: 7-8 depending on what shoes
:x: jean size: isn't this a little rude? like, 12 kids- 2 juniors
:x: hair color: dark brown/ light blonde
:x: siblings: one 23 year old sister
:x: eyes: brown
:x: college: ...
:x: jr.high: Central Middle School/ St. Raphael's
:x: elementary: St. Peter's/ St. Raphael's/ Allen Elementary
:x: hometown: Canton
:x: favorite place: hmm... I don't know.
:x: favorite soda: coke?
:x: weight: once again very rude... I'm like 111
:x: game system: hmm... I don't really play video games all that much.
:x: favorite food: I don't really have one... I guess anything besides brussels sprouts and meatloaf
:x: favorite book: The Farthest Away Mountain
:x: favorite pen: who the fuck cares
:x: favorite car: once again... don't care
:x: favorite animal: Tonya. lol
:x: waterbrand: uhh...
:x: favorite burger place: I don't eat burgers.
:x: favorite hobby: hmm... I like playing the guitar and lacrosse
:x: favorite friends: Eh... I'm too lazy to name them.
:x: bar or club: don't care
:x: favorite show: I don't watch a lot of tv but I guess I would say Viva La Bam
:x: favorite news: don't care
:x: gold or silver: silver
:x: favorite dog: uh... well, I have poodles
:x: cell phone co: Cingular
:x: favorite shirt: anything Nirvana or Kurt Cobain
:x: favorite sport: Lacrosse
:x: favorite alcohol: well, winecoolers are good.
:x: favorite computer: I guess the one I'm using right now
:x: favorite fruit: strawberries and mangoes
:x: favorite song: riite now: I have like a bazillion... a few of my favorites are Smells Like Teen Spirit, This Is The New Shit and Right Now
:x: ketchup or salsa: well, I don't really care but I guess I'd say I have ketchup more
:x: favorite milkshake: chocolate?
:x: steak or lobster: I'm a vegetarian.
:x: favorite color: Black, blue, purple and brown.
:x: favorite weather: thunderstorms.
:x: favorite state: ...Texas?
you…
:x: have a crush on someone: yeah
:x: wish you could live somewhere else: yeah
:x: think about suicide: only a few times a week
:x: believe in online dating: no, it's retarded.
:x: think others find you attractive: probably not
:x: want more piercings: yeah, I want my lip and eyebrow pierced
:x: like cleaning: ..no
:x: like roller coasters: yeah
:x: write in cursive or print: print
:x: last talked to: Lynette I think
:x: last thought of: ...
:x: last showered: last night
:x: last cut your nails: yesterday
:x: last did laundry: I don't do laundry. My mom does.
:x: last hugged a tree: haha like, last summer when Trista and I were immitating Alysscia when she humped a tree... hahahahahaha
:x: last watched anime: I never have.
:x: last prayed: I can't even remember
for or against…
:x: long distant relationships: well, it doesn't seem that easy to have one
:x: killing people: well, I guess it's not such a good idea
:x: driving drunk: against I guess
:x: gay/lesbian relationships: I don't care. Just let people live their own lives.
:x: soap operas: I don't watch them
have you…
:x: ever cried over a boy: who hasn't
:x: ever been in a fist fight: yeah
:x: ever been arrested: no
:x: ever had a friend die: no
:x: ever dated a cousin: ew no
:x: ever used a gun: no
:x: ever frenched kiss: yeah
:x: ever finished a puzzle: uh.. thats a retarded question
:x: ever got surgery: yeah
:x: ever got beat up: most likely
:x: ever hated someone: I don't actually "hate" people... I just dislike them a whole ton
:x: ever made a huge mistake: yeah
:x: ever smoked cigarettes: only a couple times. I'm not addicted.
:x: ever jogged a mile: yeah
:x: ever played w/ someone’s feelings: I don't think so... I'm not THAT mean
:x: ever had feelings for someone young: ... uh, yeah, if that counts for like, a month
what…
:x: shoes do you wear: I wear like, 5 different kinds of shoes.
:x: are you scared of: spiders haha like today when I ran away from one
:x: do you sleep in: pajamas?
:x: did you eat for lunch: gross school pizza
:x: is love: when you like someone a lot
number…
:x: of times I have had my heart broken?: a lot
:x: of hearts I have broken?: I'm not sure if I have... my mom claims I've broken hers? does that count? lol
:x: of girls I have kissed?: haha, a lot. but just in a friend way
:x: of boys I have kissed?: about 10 probably. most of them were just friend kisses though
:x: of guys/girls you've rejected?: 1
:x: of drugs you taken: if you mean caffeine or prescriptions... then a ton
:x: of accidents you been in: ha a lot.
:x: of people you lead on?: huh?
:x: of people you broke up with?: 2... I'm usually the one who gets dumped >.<
do you think you are…
:x: pretty: no
:x: funny: I amuse myself.
:x: hot: uhh...
:x: friendly: I guess
:x: ugly: yes
:x: loveable: I don't know
:x: caring: sometimes too caring
:x: dorky: haha yeah
:x: cocky: uhh... no. definately not if you're asking if I have a penis.
:x: girly: not really
:x: boyish: haha yeah
:x: smart: yeah
:x: pimp: no. that's an insult.
:x: angel: when I was little
:x: gangster: ew another insult.
:x: god: haha
favorite…
:x: five letter word: phone?
:x: comedian: I don't have one
:x: candy: Reese's peanut butter cups
:x: cartoon: I don't really watch them
:x: cereal: I don't eat cereal
:x: chewing gum: orbit
:x: day of week: friday.
:x: least fave day: thursday
:x: jello flavor: hmm.. lemon?
:x: summer/winter: summer
:x: trampolines or swimming pools: trampolines
person who last…
:x: slept in your bed: this is stupid.. it was me of course.
:x: saw you cry: I think it was Erika... but you know what? I really can't remember
:x: made you cry: getting frustrated because I didn't eat for a while and I'm hypoglycemic
:x: you went to the movies with: Melissa, Sarah, Brittany, Mike and Abby
:x: yelled at you: my mom
:x: sent you an email: an annoying bible-hugger
have you ever…
:x: said "i love you" and meant it?: yes of course
:x: gone out in public in your pajamas?: yeah
:x: kept a secret from everyone?: yeah... a lot
:x: cried during a movie?: who hasn't
:x: ever at anytime owned new kids on the block?: my sister did
:x: planned your week based on the TV Guide?: no...
:x: been on stage?: of course I have
:x: been to New York?:no
:x: England? yes
:x: Spain? no
:x: California?: no
:x: Florida?: yeah like, every year
:x: Hawaii?: no
:x: China?: no
:x: Canada?:yes
:x: France?: yes
:x: what time is it now?: 5:38 p.m
:x: apples or bananas?: bananas
:x: blue or red?: blue
:x: walmart or target?: target
:x: spring or fall?: fall
:x: what are you gonna do after you finish this?: continue sitting here
:x: what was the last meal you ate?: gross school pizza
:x: are you bored?: yeah that's obviously why I'm taking this
:x: last noise you heard?: Marilyn Manson
:x: last smell you sniffed?: Mike's perfume that he's constantly wearing
:x: last time you went out of state/province?: 3 weeks ago
friendship/love…
:x: do you believe in love at first sight?: no
:x: do you want children one day & if so, how many?: I'm not sure if I want any
:x: most important thing to you in a friendship is?: trust and getting along
random stuff…
:x: criminal record?: no
:x: do you speak any other languages?: I can speak some Spanish and German... but I can say a few sentences in French.
:x: name some of your favorite things in your bedroom?: my candles, gas lighter and cd player
:x: piercings and where?: 2 on right ear 3 on left
:x: worst feeling in the world?: when someone hates you and you know it
:x: whom you love: my friends... and 3 members of my whole entire family. haha I'm so nice
your…
:x: nickname(s): Ham... according to Carly
:x: initials: SPM
:x: how old do you look?: I think I look about 11... but that's just me.
:x: how old do you act?: haha like, 2
:x: glasses/contacts?: I wear contacts during the day and glasses at night
:x: braces: I'm getting them off in August
:x: do you have any pets?: 2 dogs
:x: you get embarrassed?: when my parents are being stupid in public. to be honest, I get embarrassed about pretty much everything
:x: what upsets you?: church and annoying people
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[04 May 2005|04:51pm] |
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Kiss and Make Up- Funeral For A Friend |
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Advanced Global Personality Test Results | Extraversion | |||||||||||| | 50% | | Stability | || | 10% | | Orderliness | || | 10% | | Empathy | |||||||||| | 36% | | Interdependence | |||||||||||||||| | 63% | | Intellectual | |||||||||||||| | 56% | | Mystical | |||||||||||| | 50% | | Artistic | |||||||||||||||||||| | 83% | | Religious | |||| | 16% | | Hedonism | |||||||||||||||||| | 76% | | Materialism | |||||||||||||||| | 70% | | Narcissism | || | 10% | | Adventurousness | |||||||||||||||| | 63% | | Work ethic | |||| | 16% | | Self absorbed | |||||||||| | 36% | | Conflict seeking | |||||||||||||||| | 70% | | Need to dominate | |||||||||||||||||||| | 90% | | | Romantic | |||||||||||||||| | 63% | | Avoidant | |||||||||||| | 50% | | Anti-authority | |||||||||||||||||| | 76% | | Wealth | |||||||||||||| | 56% | | Dependency | |||||||||||||||||| | 76% | | Change averse | |||||||||||||||||||| | 83% | | Cautiousness | |||||||||||||||| | 70% | | Individuality | |||||| | 23% | | Sexuality | |||||||||||||||| | 63% | | Peter pan complex | |||||||||||||||||||| | 90% | | Physical security | |||||||||||||||||||| | 90% | | Food indulgent | |||||||||| | 36% | | Histrionic | |||||||||||||||||||| | 90% | | Paranoia | |||||||||||||||||||| | 90% | | Vanity | |||||||||||||||||||| | 83% | | Hypersensitivity | |||||||||||||||||||| | 90% | | Female cliche | |||||||||| | 36% | |
| Take Free Advanced Global Personality Testpersonality tests by similarminds.comStability results were very low which suggests you are extremely worrying, insecure, emotional, and anxious. Orderliness results were very low which suggests you are overly flexible, improvised, and fun seeking at the expense too often of reliability, work ethic, and long term accomplishment. Extraversion results were medium which suggests you are moderately talkative, outgoing, sociable and interacting. trait snapshot: messy, irritable, depressed, fragile, worrying, emotionally sensitive, does not like to lead, phobic, weird, suspicious, low self control, paranoid, frequently second guesses self, dependent, unproductive, introverted, weak, strange, unassertive, submissive, familiar with the dark side of life, feels invisible, rash, vain, anti-authority, heart over mind, low self concept, disorganized, not good at saving money, avoidant, daydreamer, unadventurous
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[03 May 2005|09:46pm] |
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mood |
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 apathetic |
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music |
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Stupify- Disturbed |
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Today was the same... except I got an awesome picture of Kurt Cobain!! yussss. In first hour Tonya and I were passing notes and in 2nd hour we watched a movie and had to do a chart thing (oops it was homework and I forgot it >.<) In 3rd hour... we sang of course. At lunch Tonya and I were talking and all... Then outside I was with Lynette, Korey, Jen, Alyse, Joanna and Brittany. Group hug? something like that. Then I when I was going up the stairs towards my locker this 7th grade Pat kid and this gross soham were stalking me and being stupid they're like "Goth! are you still friends with Suman Panda like you were last year?" and I was ignoring them but they got on my nerves so so much I turned around and smacked the Pat kid in the face. Oh well he deserved it and I wasn't in a good mood. Okay so then I went to art... Victoria had this cardboard tube to take her drawing home in and Brittany acted like it was a dick and that she was jacking off O_O then Brittany pushed it at me and of course, trying to avoid it, I ended up falling over. Then I got up and Devin's like "Stick out your arm." I was like okay whatev and then he scratched me with this metal thing and I grabbed to tube and started whacking him with it 0:) bwahaha Mrs. Sproull didn't care she's just like "Oh Devin I think someone's mad at you." or something. haha. Then he kept wanting me to give him a hug... blahness. of course I didn't. Then in math it was soooo boring as usual and Holly once again got totally singled out by Mrs. Mackrain. I almost feel sorry for her because Mrs. Mackrain doesn't care about getting bitchy towards anyone else besides her. Then in Science Tonya and I were talking and annoying Jurlani... haha Jurlani is so retarded and Aaron kept hitting him with the meterstick. hehehe. Okay so then stupid flamer Mr. Swift comes over and leans on me and Tonya's desk for a second and I'm like "Hello?" *retarded grin* and he's like "GET OUT IN THE HALL!!" and he like, chucked my books out the door haha. it didn't really matter though cuz we had like, 5 minutes left. Well, tomorrow's my SECOND visit with the damn therapist... 4:15. *sigh* wish me luck. Well I'm gunna leave. peace.
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[02 May 2005|03:54pm] |
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mood |
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tired |
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Pieces- Sum 41 |
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wow haha
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[01 May 2005|05:55pm] |
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mood |
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 ashamed |
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music |
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You Know You're Right- Nirvana |
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God.. I have SO much stuff to write about. Okay... starting with Friday. I got to school knowing that at 10 my mom was going to come pick me up and take me to the "doctor." So I'm sitting in Social Studies talking to Holly about lice and then the office calls to Ms. Meyers room that I have to leave. So I'm like okay. When we get there I realize that my mother TOTALLY lied to me... guess where she took me? A PSYCHIATRIC HELP CENTER!!! I was SOOOOO mad at her!!! So this "Dr. Nowak" takes me to her isolated room and starts asking all these shtity questions... "Why are you here?" "Do you have a decreased appetite?" "Are you on drgus?" "Do you drink lacohol?" "Do you somke?" "Can you sleep at night?" "Do you get along with your friends?" "How is school?" "Are people mean to you?" "Do you get along with your parents?" "Are you esxually active?" "Do you have Attention Deficit Disorder?" ETC.!!! gahhh I wanted to bite her head off. So NOW I have to go to T-H-E-R-A-P-Y EVERY SINGLE WEEK! And yesterday my mom put me on P-R-O-Z-A-C!!! Yes, that's pronounced PROZZZZAC!!GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR
I'm so incredibly mad... Well, anyway...So then that night Abby, Brittany, Sarah(EWWW BLAH *BARF*) and I went to the school play. I went to the drink machine and two drinks came out. Haha. Then I was trying to block Amanda from passing me so somehow I tripped over my feet and fell flat on my assss!! LMAO!! hahahahahaha! Then Abby's dad took us to McDonald's and on the way Sarah and I got into a punching/kicking/screaming fight like little kids!! Sarah has SUCH a temper!! We were pretty much yelling at eachother the whole fricking time... then Abby, Brittany and I went into the playscape (yippee!!)and we just going through it... then SARAH (surprise surprise) got into it and we got into ANOTHER fight inside the little yellow room in the playscape and it was the worst of all. hahahahahahaha. We obviously weren't getting along too well. So yesterday was a pretty normal Saturday... I got a new purse, a new pair of pants... blah blah blah. Then today Melissa, Cayla and I went to the mall (Believe me, I only went because Melissa was going) and I got a Kurt Cobain shirt! Surprise surprise! hehe and I also got Korn and HIM pins and put them on my purse. Now I'm just sitting here... and will be for the rest of the night.
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[28 Apr 2005|09:21pm] |
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mood |
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depressed |
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music |
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Salt In Our Wounds- H.I.M. |
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Hmm... Today was practically the same as yesterday... I know I did horrible on my math test, but I did okay on my binder check so whatev. Which reminds me... yesterday we checked binders and I was so... blah and of course I got Alex's binder. I thought I was going to either cry or throw up when I saw "I love Brittany" all over it, but it just went in between and I felt really sick and...blah. Call me a stupid ho that can't let things go but whatever. I was oh so tempted to write shit all over it but something made me not do it. Whenever I see him I want to throw up. Like today when we were watching the play I was sitting a few seats behind them and when he put his arm around her... I literally started crying. I felt like I was going to start bawling, but I didn't and no one noticed anything because it was dark. I don't know what the hell is wrong with me... I seriously need to get over this. I wish I would've smacked him so so hard when I heard about Brittany.. and I don't know why I didn't. I normally would have but I guess I just couldn't... GRRRRRR!!! And please don't leave a comment saying that I'm being a selfish bitch because I know I am. Another thing... during the last two weeks my face has been breaking out. I only get a zit maybe... once every 3 months? Yeah but now I get maybe one a week. I never get them and my face is so dry that like, the skin peels off! Lmao!! I don't know how in the world I'm getting them since my face is so dry. Whatevvvvvvv. Grrr and I just heard that my mom's picking me up at 10 from school tomorrow during Social Studies to take me to a doctor for my "problems." She's so annoying! I don't need to go to a fricking doctor because there's nothing wrong with me! She's so annoying I could just like, shoot myself.
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[27 Apr 2005|09:17pm] |
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mood |
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 dirty |
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music |
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In Bloom- Nirvana |
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Heh... not to many interesting things have been happening lately. I've learned a couple days ago that making out with girls doesn't make you a lesbian... hmm... I'm just a LITTLE confused. In art I'm drawing a picture of Kurt Cobain for my project... Yes it's verayyy sexayyy. haha yes. It owns you. =) In 1st hour we I was reading a play out loud with Alison, Stephanie, Alexis and Tonya and oh it was quite the show =P It had like, old English words in it and one of the lines was "Thanks, you're a brick." or something like that... a compliment? LOL I WAS DYING OF LAUGHTER! STEPHANIE AND I ARE STILLL LAUGHING ABOUT IT!!! hahahahahahahahahahahahaha! Then there was a character named Babbs and I thought it said Boobs so once again I was dying of laughter, due to my immaturity XD Mmk. The moment we've ALL been waiting for... dun dun dun... MY BRIDGE SUCKED YOUR MOM'S ASS!! GRRR! AMY WITKOWSKI DID BETTER THAN ME!!! *pouts* My mom built mine for me and it held ONE FRICKING WEIGHT! ggRAWWWRRR!!! Omg today Jurlani brought in a blob of ROUNDED toopicks when we're supposed to use FLAT!! it wasn't even long enough and it was 55 grams overweight! haha it was sooo funny. And in 2nd hour Ms. Meyers took us to see the play and it was only the end so we came back early. Ms. Meyers was sticking her nose in the computer and DIDN'T NOTICE ALL OF THE PAPER AIRPLANES BOUNCING OFF THE CEILING! lmao it was sooo funny! James threw one at me so I threw it at Holly and then EVERYONE started making them! Jurlani started making them and whenever somebody got one of his planes they would rip it... O_o okay well.. I have to take a shower and all... peace
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[25 Apr 2005|07:47pm] |
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mood |
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music |
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Sliver- Nirvana |
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Credit to KT for my cool new layout!! XD
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[25 Apr 2005|07:36pm] |
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mood |
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blank |
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Rape Me- Nirvana |
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hmm... I haven't written in here for a while, but not a lot has been going on. In art... all Brittany talks about is esx and mastrubation. lmao today she pretended she was picking fuzz off of my shoulder and she poked my boob! I was like... uhhh.... okay Brittany lol. We pretty much talk the whole time since MY snowman is the the only presentable one *Smug smile* haha. We have to enlarge cartoons that someone else drew... I'm drawing Kurt Cobain! Surprise surprise =P Hmm... today I went to the Coney Island with my mom because she complains that I don't spend enough time with her. Okay when I'm sitting there eating french fries guess who walks in? Holly and Amy. I almost barfed up my food lmao lmao lmao!!!! Blah. Well, that's about. I SHOULD be writing this Social Studies paper... but I SOOOOOO don't want to write this! I have soooo much more important stuff to do hehehehehehehe. I'm out.
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[23 Apr 2005|11:05am] |
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mood |
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contemplative |
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Wow everyone... Tonya and Alyse both have court dates, tickets, and out-of-school suspensions. Not that I was involved, but Tonya is like, one of my bffs and Alyse has been really cool lately. It's because in Alyse's locker they found NyQuil and cigarettes and in Tonya's, cigarettes. A student had to have told someone to search their lockers and as Alyse says, if their habits upsetted you then you should have handled it a TOTALLY different way. Now science and choir are going to be beyond uber boring, especially science because I sit next to Tonya and she always makes up jokes the whole time. Like oompa loompas... LOL TONYA! Grrr. I don't see them ANY differently just because they smoke. They are still really cool people and if they want to do that, fine. It's none of anyone else's business. Good job... whoever did that is TOTALLY reminding me of Cayla right now... just peachy!! X* grin*X Ah, Arian. She just called me this morning after like, 5 months. I'm really glad that she did except she moved... AGAIN. I feel sorry for her because her mom and stepdad got divorced because he yelled all the time, etc. But then I'm glad that they're not living with him anymore since she hated him anyway. I just know that it's really hard for her and I hope she gets through it alright. Well, I'm really tired and Arian woke me up so I think I'll go sleep again...
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[22 Apr 2005|09:22pm] |
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mood |
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tired |
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music |
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Smells Like Teen Spirit- Nirvana |
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Yeah I'm bored as shit so I'm entertaining myself...
I am 63% Goth. Oh My Goth! You Goth, Girl. There is a good chance I am bi. Freakiness pumps through my viens, but I can still laugh at myself.
bi? There's a good chance I'm bi? haha I will admit that I am a freak, though
I am 69% Asshole/Bitch. I am abrasive, some people really hate me, but there may be a group of other tight knit assholes and bitches that I can hang out with and get me. Everybody else? Fuck ‘em.
Hahaha yes I am a bitch lol
I am 44% White Trash. The white trash in my blood will not keep me from becoming a doctor or a lawyer, but it will keep me from a good haircut and any sort of fashion sense.
Haha, nice
I am 27% Hippie. I need to step away from the tie-dye. I smell too good to be a hippie and my dad is probably a cop. Being a hippie is not a fashion craze, man. It was a way of life, in the 60’s, man.
Haha yeah, guess I'm not a hippie
I am 50% Ska. Well, maybe I'm trying too hard, maybe I'm not trying hard enough. I shouldn't forget my roots, and remember that punk and reggae wouldn't exist without ska.
heh.
I am 67% Grunge. I am pretty dirty, all right and, I reek of teen spirit... I would sell my own children for a moldy hotpocket, man.
haha, I love teen spirit.
I am 54% Raver. I may not be freaky like those Candy Kids, but I do know how to party. I am well connected in the scene, but may be getting a little tired of it.
...
I am 79% Metal Head. I was born with the mark of the beast on my forehead and an axe in my arms. I am the god of all things metal! Now if only I could get my parents to give me back my car keys.....
hehehe...
I am 56% Emo. Well.. I've made the cut! Now I'll go buy some promise rings and knit myself a sweater.
errr...okay =P
I am 37% Geek. You probably work in computers, or a history deptartment at a college. You never really fit in with the "normal" crowd. But you have friends, and this is a good thing.
geek...
I am 61% Internet Addict. I am pretty addicted, but there is hope. I think I'm just well connected to the internet and technology, but it's really a start of a drug-like addiction. I must act now! Unplug this computer!
yeah, I am online a lot...
I am 63% Punk Rock. The intelligent punk. Tuff and Smart. I may be able to maintain a train of thought long enough... What the fuck was I talking about?
what???
Yay!! You passed
Do you know Wicca?
brought to you by Quizilla
Yes of course I did.
Mors
?? Which Of The Greek Gods Are You ??
brought to you by Quizilla
Mars? lol
Ah... I've taken soooo many of these now and I'm sick of them.
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[22 Apr 2005|07:47pm] |
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Bitches- Mindless Self Indulgence |
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These last couple of days have been mentally worse. Everyone confuses me and tells me what a bitch I am and how reckless, mean, careless, etc. I am. That doesn't only mean my parents, it means a lot of my friends, too. I feel like I'm totally forgetting about people and going off into my own little world... I don't want to sound like a self-centered asshole but my mom's seriously been stressing me out and I hate it. I can't sleep at all and I feel like shit. Last night at like 11:30 I decided to eat something because I hadn't eaten since lunch... It was so gross... I had like, gross mashed potatoes, yogurt and 2 midgety hard-boiled eggs. It was so disgusting but later I threw it all up anyway... probably because I was so grossed out and no one cares to feed me around this hellhole. I need to like, go on a vacation or something. I didn't do as well on this report card as I did last time...
Language Arts: A+
Social Studies: B
Careers: A-
Choir: A
Math: C
Science: C-
Overall my GPA was 3.16. Last quarter I had a 3.3. Yes I know I suck at math and science. Mr. Swift also left comments like..."Socializing interferes with learning." "Has 3 missing assignments." and shit like that. Jeez I hate Mr. Swift and I think he should go jump off a bridge. Hahaha I just realized... I forgot to write that journal entry for Language Arts yet I still have an A+...=P strange...
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[20 Apr 2005|03:53pm] |
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Red Is The New Black- Funeral For A Friend |
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Okay... I've been "grounded" from the computer(still am) for a long time and I have a TON to write in here. So after all that happened in my last entry I went to the movies with Melissa, Mike, Abby, Sarah, and Brittany. We saw The Ring2 and it wasn't really scary. More of depressing since the only funny part is when the kid's mom got to the top of the well and she's like "I'm not your fucking mommy." We were the only ones there so it was fun that would could run around and be... loud and all. So when I get in the car my mom's like "sooo what's this about your wrist or something?" Okay I was thinking *Wtf, Cayla did not do this.* And then she's talking to me saying she wants to "help" me and shit.. I mean, what the hell! She needs to go bury herself in a hole and die. Then I get home and there's this big thing where my mom's freaking out and I go upstairs. I called Abby on the phone and my mom's like "Now don't clost the door!!" and I'm like "OKAY WHAT THE HELL!!!!!" and crap like that then I go in the basement and my mom calls my uncle and tells him the WHOOOOLE story so now like, out whole fricking family knows about everything that goes on in my life and it drives me crazy. My mom wouldn't let me on the computer, the phone, close my door or anything else. Then she calls a DOCTOR so now I'm REEEEEEALLY mad!!! So when I'm in the basement I hear all of this rummaging upstairs... I went up and all the knives and pills in my house are totally gone... wow really I'm just going to go overdose myself right now! What losers. Then she calls like 10000000 counselours and shit like that!! She was "checking" on me every 2 seconds when I was in my room and I'm like "How...The...Fuck...Am I supposed to sleep... when you keep coming in here! My mom slept outside my door. She had to "escort" me to the bathroom. She only did that the first night but I'm still not allowed to walk down the street. My mom keeps telling me that I can't be mad at Cayla or anything... She pisses me off! I wouldn't consider her my "enemy" but you can't be exactly be "friends" with someone you can't even TRUST!!! GRRRR!!! >XD There's just so much crap going on that I just can't remember it all. Oh yeah and my mom took my razor, too so for a couple days I couldn't shave. It was so stupid I can't even tell you. I've made at least 200 phonecalls in the last 5 days and all I do is sit in my room, drink diet coke and blare the radio out my window. Seriously, I'm going insane. I'm still "grounded" from the computer so I won't be on. Call me 844-0920 because I'll have nothing to do for the rest of forever. Today we had a sub in math and everyone's always so bad when we have a sub so Mr. Johnston was in there the whoooole hour hovering over people's shoulders and monitering everyone. It was sooooooo annoying. Okay well I'm supposed to be "doing homework" so I'll talk to you later. Oh yeah... Happy 420 everyone!!!XD
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[15 Apr 2005|06:22pm] |
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myself SCREAMING MY HEAD OFF! |
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Wow this... is the most pissed... I have ever... been... in my whole... LIFE!!!!! >:o So now Cayla and Abby call my house saying that if I don't talk to them they're going to call my mom and tell the counselour. Wow wow wow wow wowwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww it's because they "care" about me wtf if they cared about me they would leave me alone when I ASKED them to! So they're bugging me and Cayla starts crying. Well, SO SORRY IF I DON'T WANT YOU KNOWING EVERYTHING ABOUT MY LIFE! God >:o So there's someone on my other line... I pick it up and it's some energy source person wanting to talk to the "owner of the house"... so I say my mom's teaching WHICH SHE WAS and she says she'll call back later. So when I go back to them I just eavesdropped a TINY bit... LUCKY AS HELL THAT I DID! so I hear them saying that THAT WAS CAYLA'S MOM!!! WOW NOW... WOW WOW WOW!!!!!!!! WTF!!!!!!!!! I'm going to call WideOpenWest and tell them to block Cayla's number. I am not even kidding. Cayla's making me go to her house now with Abby and talk to her. haha yeah right like THAT'S going to happen. WOW WWOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW I DON'T NEED TO DEAL WITH SHIT LIKE THIS RIGHT NOW!!!!!! PEOPLE SERIOUSLY NEED TO GO AWAY AND LEAVE ME THE FUCK ALONE!!!
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[14 Apr 2005|11:23pm] |
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the voices in my head |
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Vertigo by U2 |
"The night is full of holes
Those bullets rip the sky
Of ink with gold
They twinkle as the boys play rock and roll"
In 2004 you partied so hard... you forgot how to count.
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Obviously I'm bored. I don't like that song.^
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[14 Apr 2005|08:55pm] |
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the underworld calling me... |
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ha well... I'm sitting here, I SHOULD be typing this paper, and I'm observing what awesome friends I have. They all deserve credit:
Hopefullone90: o hun fuck him
Hopefullone90: ur ovisalsy to good 4 him
Hopefullone90: im not just saying it really ur so nice hes just stupid
Hopefullone90: fucked up ass hole
^Alexis I love you
allthingsrock620: I don't know, Susannah. I don't get it. Guys are stupid. Maybe Brittanys more of a whore. Haha maybe? She IS more of a whore.
allthingsrock620: You KNOW your better than her.
allthingsrock620: You KNOW we all like you better than her. We got your back ^_^
allthingsrock620: Ok... annoying people like Sam don't like you.
allthingsrock620: And then theres Alyse. lol
allthingsrock620: And um, reality check. NO ONE LIKES SAM
allthingsrock620: we SOOO need to hang out susannah!!!
^Lynette I love you
lostcomefindme13: because hes an ass
lostcomefindme13: britts kinda a slut
lostcomefindme13: well its his loss
lostcomefindme13: maybe its cuz shes slutty
^Melissa I love you
mandat r3: Alex was just blind and retarted to not see that
^Amanda I love you
There were more... I just closed their windows. Credit to everyone else, too. blah.
TaintedLove MM09: pshaw
TaintedLove MM09: im gangsta
TaintedLove MM09: ghetto
TaintedLove MM09: bia bia
TaintedLove MM09: hahaha
TaintedLove MM09: yesss
TaintedLove MM09: i smelled a pixie stick today
TaintedLove MM09: its sour
TaintedLove MM09: you really should try it
TaintedLove MM09: i now call it coke candy
^okay that's just Lindsay being a freak... haha =P
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[14 Apr 2005|05:10pm] |
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Okay so today wasn't that great either. I keep hearing all these "sorry"s and shit and it's making everything worse. I just want to forget about all this. Okay well lately everyone's been pissing me off again... I wish everyone would just go awayyyyyyyyyy. Sam Howlin is the stupidest bitch I've ever met. She's been making Jen really unhappy lately so I commented in Jen's livejournal: "Yeah Sam's a fucking whore and she needs to die." which... is true. Well anyway... so today she comes up to me and she's like "Oh so I'm a fucking whore and I need to die?" and I just smiled and shook my head yes. She walked away and now all day whenever she passes me she's like "bitch" like I really give a damn about what she thinks I am. She's so stupid and fake. Brittany (Sills) and I were discussing her in the bus line and Brittany's like "Yeah, she started cutting herself now because when I used to she saw my arm and she wants attention." Then another time she went up to Brittany and was like "Yeah, can I see your arm?" Brittany's like... "ummm...whyyyyyyy?" And Sam's like "Because I have scars on my wrist and they won't go away." Wow talk about an excuse to have Brittany notice her... God I hate people like that!!! She's nothing she sees herself as. Like Alyse says: "we're all sick of Sam." Okay she's not that important for me to keep talking about so I'm done. When I got into choir I sat down next to Cayla and in a few minutes Mrs. Calzone came in and started yelling at us. Then Miranda and Alyse came running into the room late and Mrs. Calzone like, had a heart attack and took Alyse to her office or something. I'm so glad she's not the choir teacher. So when we were watching a movie in choir Mr. Johnston like, calls the room and says I have to go to his office... I like, started freaking out but when I got there it was for the stupidest reason... he wanted to talk to me about what happened in math yesterday. Like I was really paying attention to everyone else! I was too busy thinking. He asked me about Holly Gudzinski and Justin Eberlin... I was like "umm... well, the sub pulled Holly's hair and I wasn't paying attention to Justin." SERIOUSLY! get a reason to call me to your office next time. I have better things to do. We had this dumb credit card presentation in careers so that was pretty boring... then I went to math and Mrs. Foss came in and gave us an emo speech about yesterday. She's like "Look deep inside your heart..." haha everyone was trying not to laugh. For the rest of math she Mrs. Deininger was talking about 3.4 or something. I wasn't paying attention, I was too busy writing shit. Science was just boring there's nothing to say about it. I know no one cares what I think... but now I'm going to tell you ALL the things that pissed me off today! Stupid girls, Stupid boys, Stupid Mr. Johnston, Stupid Mr. Swift, Stupid Language Arts paper, Stupid guitar lessons, Stupid Ms. Wilder, Stupid Sam, Stupid everyone. gahhh.
Yesterday Lynette and Cayla said that I'm cute when I'm frustrated or TRYING to hate someone. haha very...... okay well, I need to go to my guitar lesson in like, 5 minutes.
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